Musings: Family
So I was thinking tonight about family.....
Our world moves too fast to keep up to everybody now. Think of how many family members you have sprawled all over the country and the world. When I was a kid, we spent so much time with my grandparents and cousins. But now as adults, my sister lives in the US and I see her once every year and a half. I have a cousin who lives in Australia and I see her once every five years. I see my other cousins I grew up with about every two years. My parents live 8 hours away. I miss the connection we had when we were growing up. I miss all my family. I also feel like I'm depriving my kids of that because they don't have that. None of my family lives here.
I think it's true that to know where we're going we have to know where we've been. I was thinking tonight about my other family. My ex is a part of my family whether either of us likes it or not. But I feel like we've reached a point where we've put the past behind us and have become friends. I think we also had to learn about healthy boundaries for us. It took some time, but we've both grown and our relationship changed. I think we were very unhealthy together, but I don't think that means that we can't be healthy with other people. If I didn't see where I'd gone wrong and what part I played, I'd be doomed to repeat it. I'm a lot less of a victim now and less dependent on him than I used to be. And that is making us all the better parents for it, I think. Family is what we make it. Sometimes you and your family can't keep as close as you once did. But that doesn't mean we don't love our family any less.
More ramblings to come....
Our world moves too fast to keep up to everybody now. Think of how many family members you have sprawled all over the country and the world. When I was a kid, we spent so much time with my grandparents and cousins. But now as adults, my sister lives in the US and I see her once every year and a half. I have a cousin who lives in Australia and I see her once every five years. I see my other cousins I grew up with about every two years. My parents live 8 hours away. I miss the connection we had when we were growing up. I miss all my family. I also feel like I'm depriving my kids of that because they don't have that. None of my family lives here.
I think it's true that to know where we're going we have to know where we've been. I was thinking tonight about my other family. My ex is a part of my family whether either of us likes it or not. But I feel like we've reached a point where we've put the past behind us and have become friends. I think we also had to learn about healthy boundaries for us. It took some time, but we've both grown and our relationship changed. I think we were very unhealthy together, but I don't think that means that we can't be healthy with other people. If I didn't see where I'd gone wrong and what part I played, I'd be doomed to repeat it. I'm a lot less of a victim now and less dependent on him than I used to be. And that is making us all the better parents for it, I think. Family is what we make it. Sometimes you and your family can't keep as close as you once did. But that doesn't mean we don't love our family any less.
More ramblings to come....
posted by trudyrox at 12:22 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home