Musings: Men Suck

So I'm trying to think of what the hell is wrong with me.

How is it possible to miss someone who was an asshole to you? I knew there'd be days where I would miss him. I just wish I could turn it off. I guess it's inevitable when you are used to someone being in your life for 3 years. One of the last times we talked we discussed why it's so hard to let each other go. We both found each other at a time when we didn't have anybody else. Maybe it's just scary moving on. We also came up with the theory that maybe we were addicted to each other. I told him we would both be ok. It hasn't been too bad because I got rid of everything that reminded me of him, except this computer he got me for Christmas. And when he pops in my head I think of something else right away and push him out. Some times are harder than others to push him out. Is it part of the process when you purge someone out of your life to sometimes miss them? I know it wasn't meant to be and that it couldn't have worked out. But I wish there was a way to program your heart