The First Sting of Rejection
Well..........
It's been a few weeks since my last post. Well, I got together my pitch. I was the first person out of 15 to pitch for a panel of two NFB producers, one CBC producer and one Saskfilm producer. I decided to take a risk and pitch something very personal. I pitched the story of my depression brought on by domestic violence and the struggle to overcome it. I finished my pitch, and the producers all said, "Wow!" and "That was powerful." They all said how great it was and how brave it was to pitch a personal story like that. So I walked out of there feeling very good about my chances. I knew going in that there was a slim chance I'd get chosen. But, still, you can imagine my surprise when I get a call the following Monday morning from one of the producers saying, "We did not choose your idea, sorry". She said it was a good idea but it would have been too much of a time and research investment. Not sure what that means, but I didn't ask because I just wanted to get off the phone and cry. Yes, I realized getting into this business that rejection is a big part of it, but it was my first sting of rejection and was a big let down because i really, really wanted this. A person very dear to me, with the best of intentions, started giving me the old, "this isn't your time", "God has other plans for you" and "one day you'll look back at this and laugh" crap, which didn't help.
I had talked to a few people after the selection committee got back to us and their feedback was a little different. One friend said they told her her idea wasn't focused enough. Another friend said they told her other people just visualized their idea better than her. So, I think when the sting dies down, I'm going to contact them to find out what exactly "too much time and research investment" means. It's MY story, I don't need to research. But, whatever. Maybe that was just their nice way of saying, "their ideas were better than yours". The other thing I thought about was a story one of my instructors had told me about when she was on a selection committee. They had to pick one film to make and had narrowed it down to two people, one male, one female. It was so close that the jury had argued and argued over who to give it to. The male won, but it was very, very close. Because she was on the selection committee, she couldn't divulge what happened during the selection process to the female and she never knew just how close she was and what a good job she did. Our instructor said the female had lost all confidence after that and never went on to make any films. And the sad part is, I can totally see how that can happen. It's not like a job interview where if you don't get it, they say someone was more qualified or better suited to the job than you and it's not that big a deal. As an artist, you put yourself out there and make yourself vulnerable, especially if you are pitching your own story. It feels like a rejection of you.
So, the next day they sent out an email announcing the winners and said to those of you not selected this time around, keep developing your ideas and keep pitching. Right. Anyway, I sucked it up and sent a congratulatory email to the winners pretending to be happy for them, because you can't burn any bridges in this biz. I know I will be happy for them in the future. It just sucks right now! Any suggestions on how to get used to dealing with rejection, I'd appreciate.
More ramblings to come.......
It's been a few weeks since my last post. Well, I got together my pitch. I was the first person out of 15 to pitch for a panel of two NFB producers, one CBC producer and one Saskfilm producer. I decided to take a risk and pitch something very personal. I pitched the story of my depression brought on by domestic violence and the struggle to overcome it. I finished my pitch, and the producers all said, "Wow!" and "That was powerful." They all said how great it was and how brave it was to pitch a personal story like that. So I walked out of there feeling very good about my chances. I knew going in that there was a slim chance I'd get chosen. But, still, you can imagine my surprise when I get a call the following Monday morning from one of the producers saying, "We did not choose your idea, sorry". She said it was a good idea but it would have been too much of a time and research investment. Not sure what that means, but I didn't ask because I just wanted to get off the phone and cry. Yes, I realized getting into this business that rejection is a big part of it, but it was my first sting of rejection and was a big let down because i really, really wanted this. A person very dear to me, with the best of intentions, started giving me the old, "this isn't your time", "God has other plans for you" and "one day you'll look back at this and laugh" crap, which didn't help.
I had talked to a few people after the selection committee got back to us and their feedback was a little different. One friend said they told her her idea wasn't focused enough. Another friend said they told her other people just visualized their idea better than her. So, I think when the sting dies down, I'm going to contact them to find out what exactly "too much time and research investment" means. It's MY story, I don't need to research. But, whatever. Maybe that was just their nice way of saying, "their ideas were better than yours". The other thing I thought about was a story one of my instructors had told me about when she was on a selection committee. They had to pick one film to make and had narrowed it down to two people, one male, one female. It was so close that the jury had argued and argued over who to give it to. The male won, but it was very, very close. Because she was on the selection committee, she couldn't divulge what happened during the selection process to the female and she never knew just how close she was and what a good job she did. Our instructor said the female had lost all confidence after that and never went on to make any films. And the sad part is, I can totally see how that can happen. It's not like a job interview where if you don't get it, they say someone was more qualified or better suited to the job than you and it's not that big a deal. As an artist, you put yourself out there and make yourself vulnerable, especially if you are pitching your own story. It feels like a rejection of you.
So, the next day they sent out an email announcing the winners and said to those of you not selected this time around, keep developing your ideas and keep pitching. Right. Anyway, I sucked it up and sent a congratulatory email to the winners pretending to be happy for them, because you can't burn any bridges in this biz. I know I will be happy for them in the future. It just sucks right now! Any suggestions on how to get used to dealing with rejection, I'd appreciate.
More ramblings to come.......
posted by trudyrox at 3:31 PM
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